New blog update from captain Ridgeway (VW Van)

We've had a chaotic few days and some fairly big changes that I'll get to on another update - additional drivers, route changes, car ownership swaps, modifications, secret past lives all to follow. However, this is Jon's entry so I'll let him get on with it.

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So, here I am again with my second update from Team Blind panic...work is well and truly underway with the van at the moment and so far I seem to be spending enough money on it to put the UK economy back on track once more!!

Since my last update I have hard at work beginning the transformation from old painters panel van to blinging pimp my ride levels of cool... unfortunately, now that I am getting older, what I thought was cool just isn’t cool any more... in fact, I don’t even know what cool is!!

But not to be put off, I have set about taking my van in to the workshop, and paying a bodywork guy to install some limo tint rear windows, to treat and spray any bad bits and make the van mint condition again. He said it was going to be a quick job which I was pleased about, as that meant I could get on with insulating the van to make it both warm and soundproof.

Two weeks pass by and he still has it... and I’m starting to bitch at him for taking his sweet time about fixing it up. Eventually I get it back and it looks amazing!! .... BUT.... he hadn’t lacquered one of the panels, so I handed it straight back to him!

Thankfully though he has done an amazing job and as he quoted for the entire job, I have had more than my money’s worth out of him considering he told me “It used so much paint I could have painted a house!”

So now I was left with a lovely looking van with rusty old steel wheels on... I couldn’t have that, so after some looking around, I “persuaded” a really nice lady from my VW forum out of a set of 17” 2010 Audi A3 alloys, and as these come wrapped in some nice sticky Toyo tyres I figured they could wait to go on until the nice weather.

Realising that money was quickly becoming something I seemed to spend before I had earnt it, I thought at this point it would be a good idea to start saving some, so before you knew it, I had researched veggie oil... and have started to run my van on that. Before I was spending £1.40 a litre and now I am down to 90p a litre!! This year my Volvo earnt me the prize for having the highest fuel bill... this year I intend on turning the tables!!

Anyway, recently I put the deposit down for the all important bed, which is going to be suitably big enough that not even my lovely co-pilot will be able to hog it all and I have finally started insulating the interior, the only problem is I look at the calendar and look at my to-do list and cant help but think its all going to be one mad rush to get it finished...

Daisy Duke did it, in the snow, with an MGTF...?

Marc has been nominated by himself to write a swift blog entry on behalf of Curly, Charlie and himself. The following words obviously do not represent the wishes or consent of all three of them, however, I think it's funny so no editing by me whatsoever.

There are some bits that he has overlooked, concerning the homosexual treats they give each other. These treats are like scooby snacks to the boys, so if you find yourself dealing with them in a professional capacity, they are easily distracted by Gingerbread Latte's with a side order of Tiffin (whatever the feck that is).

As I'm in a bit of a rush at the moment, I'm gonna simply cut and paste the mighty 5's words, throw some purty pics in, and leave you to it...

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So.... Mr. Savage has asked us to introduce ourselves via this blog and as such you have some info about the three amigos from the south east London/Kent borders.... Marc, James & Charlie, otherwise known as Five, Curly and Dizzy.

This Blog update goes on and on about cars and racing and for good reason. That is the one common denominator that has brought this rag tag group of misfits together. Not just us three but the whole group taking part in the drive. We all have different backgrounds, different interests, different views, different political and religious standpoints, we’re different ages and at different stages of our lives but don’t care a jot about any of these differences. All we care about is that we enjoy each others company, will help each other with anything, have a good laugh, have the same sense of humour, are all a little silly and like doing something fun and trying to raise a bit of money for charity in the process.

And so... Us three... We all work together and have been brought together by one common factor.... Cars, Bikes and Motorsport. We love it all - Moto GP, WSB, BSB, F1, BTCC, DTM, and even more random stuff like Hill climb, Drag Racing, Karting, A1GP, Le Mans TT racing and all more. You will usually find us on random weekends at Brands Hatch watching something with an engine and wheels go round in circles as fast as it’s pilot can make it go.

So a love of Motorsport... Not something unusual to bring together three blokes who intend to drive across Europe for no reason other than some fun and to try to raise a bit of money and awareness for charity right? Except for one thing. Charlie is Charlotte, no not by means of an operation, she was born female and remains so to this day but she has an amazing love of cars. This did come as a surprise to the boys.

Both Five and Curly remember sitting around talking cars with some dizzy blonde sitting next to them who piped up with words to the effect of “I love the RX8, it’s rear wheel drive and is proper fast with that rotary engine... plus it’s sooo pretty in canary yellow with it’s suicide doors” In short she’s an all round girl until you mention cars then she becomes a little odd. In a nice way of course. From then until now a friendship ensued held together by oil and BHP.

We love her and she loves us, besides which she has agreed to dress up as Daisy Duke for our European Adventure and that’s a good thing. The only negative things about Charlie are that she cannot drive unless it’s forwards in a straight line and she can only drive in dry weather. Oh... and she owned an MGtF. Which she crashed. In the snow. backwards. Into a lamp post. Bless her but she will mostly be a passenger on our little European adventure.

Then you’ve got James “Curly”. He would not look good as Daisy Duke (I think). He’s a strange little fellow. A little bit like Richard Hammond without the fan base... or the money... or the sense of humour. In fact the only similarity is that he is short with sticky up hair and can’t drive for toffee. (Sorry Richard but ‘that’ Jet Car ‘moment’?!) Curly has a tendency to ‘vision down’ when driving. He would argue (like he does about most things) but a point in case would be when, somewhere in Germany, followed by seven colleagues... Five the co-pilot at this stage says “take your next left” which Curly does. Down a no left turn, through no entry signs and then the wrong way down a four lane carriageway towards oncoming traffic..... followed by all seven colleagues behind who think he knows what he’s doing. Lesson - Curly rarely knows what he’s doing and requires precise, intimate instructions for everything from using the loo to changing the TV channel.

He passed his ARDS “back in the day” and has driven some proper race cars on track, not just track days in your own car. He can drive round in circles reasonably quickly and has taken part in a few track day events. He has an odd love for ‘Fast Fords’ and odd racing formulas. You’re likely to find him at something random like truck racing or sidecar racing and partakes in a yearly pilgrimage to Le Mans.

Then we have Marc ‘Five’ We all have several different nicknames, and we’ll stick with these ones for today. There’s no need to elaborate on where these names come from but suffice to say it’s quite inventive and owes something to our fellow road trip companions. Five has gone through more cars in his driving career than most people go through in a lifetime. The reasons for this are a tendency to drive everything like its partaking in a stage of the World Rally Championship... Unfortunately the cars aren’t built for this kind of abuse so invariably blow up... not to mention that Five isn’t a Rally car driver so there is also the distinct likelihood that this lack of expertise has occasionally resulted in some damaged cars.

In the dry, fast as buggery. In the wet? watch those kerbs and roundabouts. The problem is that you would think that if you drive too fast in the wet you’d learn your lesson right? no. Five has taken part in some track days, driven rally spec cars on events, done a bit of Karting and is the motorcyclist of our little group. Five and Curly have been talking about buying a car, passing the ARDS test and getting into amateur racing, our bank accounts don’t agree that this is a good idea.

As a result of all of this, Five has experienced all kinds on wheels, front wheel, rear wheel, four wheel, superbikes, from a classic mini, a boy racer Hot hatch, a commuter SV650, a ‘indicators optional’ BMW, a Subaru Impreza WRC, a Ferrari F355, and a CBR600RR... The list could go on forever! Five would not suit a Daisy Duke costume either.

Last year we rebuilt an FTO which was fast, noisy and stupid. we drove across Europe drawing attention to ourselves, looking ridiculous and raising money for charity. It was hilarious and we made some friends for life. We broke down in bizarre yet comical fashion in Bruges, Hence our decision to do it again this year. There has been a slight change to our plans. Richy ‘Hill’ and Holcsy are buying our escort cabbie to use on the run because we have sourced another car. Something ‘different’. Something Italian...

Something Alfa Romeo. We have a 2001 Alfa Romeo 156 T-Spark Veloce. It has a massive spoiler, tinted windows, induction kit, sports exhaust and in our style will be fast, noisy and stupid. again. Only this time we hope to make it back to English soil on our own wheels. (all four of them!)

Things are progressing with the run. The charity have been informed of our intentions. The cars are coming together. The route is almost there apart from some tweaking.

That's us. That's what we’re doing. Hope you enjoyed the update and I'll leave it to Monsieur Savage to elaborate on the event in more detail when it all gets more finalised!

A little whine....

So far, all seems to be going well. Not much progression, but it'll all fall into place soon.

This week had a high point for me in that I won a competition with Performance Ford magazine and gained an interesting book written by one of Ford's RS designers and some stickers.

I emailed them over my details so they could post the prizes out to me and mentioned a summary of Juliette as my toy. They replied almost immediately with a request for images, so keep your eyes open if you read PF Magazine.

Those of you that read my previous blog fed back how much you enjoyed my suffering at the hands of royal mail on a regular basis, and as such, I'll share my joyful day with you.

There is a tenuous link to the run, so not entirely off blog topic, but in the abscence of anything else to write about, I'm going to take this opportunity to have a moan...

Yesterday afternoon I tried to pay my phone bill, by telephone, using a bank debit card. Fair enough, so I telephoned them to make payment.

Having got past their automated switchboard and selected pay bill, advised which number I was phoning from, then typed in the phone number I wanted to pay the bill for, it then asked me to key in my bill amount. To be fair, I have no idea so when prompted I selected the text my balance option and waited rather than be disconnected.

That came through so I punched in precisely what they already knew my balance to be, opted confirm, then slowly keyed in my bank card number, then expiry date, then CSC security number, then my digits from my postcode and I waited for the usual payment reference you expect. I didn't get that. What I got was "Your payment has been declined".

Occasionally I have trouble hitting the right numbers on the touch screen, so assumed naturally I had mis-keyed something. I got through to an operator who patiently explained she couldn't advise me why it hadn't gone through. I patiently advised her I had probably buggered it up at my end, could she take the details again. We went through the whole process again (which involved a couple of minutes of me trying to remember my o2 password) to be met with "sorry...".

A little miffed, I figured I'd deal with it in the morning and trundled off to see a client. Soon as I got in the car, the little orange diesel logo appeared on the display and the read out told me I had only got 30 or so miles left. Not trusting my card for a debit purchase, I figured I'd chance it as the client was due to pay me that evening. 15 miles each way, I played the gamble.

I stopped off on the way to my destination at a cash point and checked my balance... yep, plenty of funds available, no worries. Unfortunately, the client didn't pay me in cash so I needed a cash point stop. It's only on the way back that I stopped to draw cash out that the machine told me to bugger off.

Balance = enough, available balance - same, issuing = nothing.

I made it back on fumes and prayers, with a steady slow drive and figured I'd look into it this morning.

So this morning, I nipped out to ASDA's cash machine to be greeted with the same numbers, but again, not letting me have anything. It's my bloody money, let me have it. A little anger had started to work it's way into my system. I drove off towards my closest Barclays working my insults through in my head.

I got there, I walked in and was met at Havant Barclays by the most cheerful and helpful bloke I have ever met. To lay into him with a torrent of adjectives and verbs would be like kicking a newborn puppy... it can't be done. Maybe that's why he was in the customer comforting role?

Anyway, he heard my story, took my details and ushered me to a Personal Banking Manager. Posh title, and another cheerful employee. I want to rip them new ones and the frustration was getting a bit much but they were useful. I then got told I had a fraud marker on my account. Always worrying, but they phoned the fraud team up to see what was occuring.

The fraud lady said there was unusual activity on the account so they had frozen it "for my best interests". How precisely is not letting me have any money in my best interests? They have my contact details, bloody phone me. I won't mind. If I've used my card, I've used it. If I haven't, then thank you. Dont just block it and not tell me.

After a bit of a drawn out convo, it appears that I had used my card "out of character"... Had I paid for a Thai bride? Had I used it abroad? Maybe even bought some flowers for the wifelet? All of these would be out of the norm, but no.

The reason my card was stopped and the buggers wouldn't give me anything is because I had spent £50 or so............


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on bloody eBay! Buying the rear shocks for the cabriolet (told you there was a link).

Barely a week goes by without me buying something on eBay. It's what I do you morons. I have a sellers account on there linked to my bank account. There are countless ins and outs every month. How the bloody hell is that out of character? Livid.

Anyway, I would like to end this entry with a simple few words....

If you want to open a bank account where you can't use your own money, Barclays.

Gonads.

Quick update for you...

Another quick update for you as I feel I should put some effort into writing this.

I'm not too sure how the others are getting on, so I'll let them tell you, but heres my highlights since the last updates...

Juliette has been having some issues in the past with ride height issues (way too low for practical use) so thats left 3 options; a) Use a different car, b) coilover suspension or c) change the springs.

Option a is simply a big fat no-no, and option b is a potential for when work picks up but is a bit pricey at the moment so option c has come into play.

Everybodies favourite shop (eBay) has yielded a couple of bargains for me this week. I've been thinking whethera 60mm drop is the way forward and whilst looking for guidance from the big chavvy cab in the sky, I found a set of 30mm lowering bendy bits at 99p, no reserve smiling at me with a couple of days left on them.

I watched these, refreshing the page as if daring the price to rise, but it sat there at 99p. It appeared no-one wanted to show these springs love and as the end time came closer, I decided it would be the sensible grown up thing to do to buy them.

The auction ended at a whopping 99 pence. That was Thursday, it's now Monday and the seller hasn't yet got back to me to let me know when I can collect them. I'm hoping he's not gonna be stroppy about them going for so little and gets back to me.

I'm thinking about a set of 17" multispokes to fill the hole left by the car raising up so much, just need to pray to the eBay fairies for another bargain to reveal itself although one of my neighbours has a spare set he's considering parting with.

That leaves only 3 real issues (plus a few niggles) with the car before it is battle ready... The rear shocks, the fusebox and the MOT.

I have a feeling that the MOT isn't going to be an issue, it seems fine, the last MOT had advisories about brakes (now replaced with RS ones on each corner), shocks (get to that in a minute) and something else which I can't remember but know it was something Ash addressed / swapped when we put the new engine in. May have a slight issue with emissions, but should be ok.

After months of headscratching and cleaning earths around the car it's come back to the decisin the fuse box is knackered. In the last 6 months, the poor thing has gone through 3 and the current one is a little bit of a bodge. It works, but it drains the battery, so if the car isn't taken for a run it needs jumping.

The rear shocks issue is now solved courtesy of eBay again. Jamex Rear shock and springs should be on their way to me shortly so thats cool. I don't need the springs so they'll go back on eBay and being brand new, hopefully, they'll get something back against the cost of the shocks.

At the current rate, Ash is buying an RS2K ever week for weird projects/donors so hoping to steal one of his fuseboxes when he's not looking (although he may guess who the culprit is when I hand it to him and ask him to fit it to mine).



The route is nearly set, the days are nearly in place, Juliette is on her way to being ready and the world is a shiny happy place? Sort of.



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Foot note - just checked my emails and the chap has got back to me about the springs - I'm going to go collect them (couple hours round trip) soon ish. Yay.

Here's Holcsy...

A rite guys and girls! i is Holcsy, one of the newest additions to the Rouge Run crew! So this will be a little insite into me!

General, 27, from the country! hgv2 driver, simples!


luckly enough im co-driving with Richy! christ we go bk, know richy since we were 10!

2 main things you need to know about me!


1, ford fan! all i eva had is ford, mainly escorts! which comes to my little toy! 1987 s2 Escort Rst!

Mr Savage is gona be dissapointed but i wont be taken her! i doubt she'd do 300 let alone 3000 miles! lol!


2nd thing is that i am a mighty Gooner! i generally live and die in an Arsenal shirt! as you will see coz i will be wearing a different one every day of the trip! and if there is a game on while we away, mite ave to fake a little break down near a pub! even if i ave to listen to it in gobble de gook! but lets keep that our little secret!


Rich and i have not got a car yet but will post as soon as and keep you updated to wat we are doing to it!


THIS TRIP IS GOING TO BE EPIC

Words from Mr Ridgeway...

So... at the polite request of Mr Savage, I thought I would scribble a few things down as a brief introduction of Kelly and I. Although people may look at me and think quite sensible, that’s only during the day job, the rest of the time I’m still a kid at heart (like most men) and am only truly happy when doing something stupid!

As for Kelly, when she isn’t trying to train her IT minions to do her bidding, she can normally be found shamelessly promoting her magazine or perfecting her cage fighting techniques. You know the phrase ‘good things come in small packages?’ well this small package bites!

As Chris said, we met early this year as part of a charity event where we had decided to thrash cheap old cars around Europe in an event designed to raise as much money for charity as possible, although to be honest, the grim reality is I spent far more on my car than I ever raised for the charity!

To contradict my previous description as ‘sensible’ I ended up buying a 2.5 turbo Volvo, partly because it was different to the fleet of BMW’s that take part in these events, partly because it’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing but mainly because I was getting desperate to find a car!! Having said that, it was a monster... more than once I found myself with a big grin on my face while overtaking new expensive cars with both my wheels spinning!

I got rid of it after the run because it had developed an unnatural thirst for oil and sounded like it would blow up at any moment, so after selling it to some Essex wide boy... Kelly and I flew up to Edinburgh and parted with a fist full of cash to buy a van. Not as sporty as a Volvo, but comfortable enough for big miles and enough capacity to carry BBQ’s and beer all the way around Europe! Now, having tagged ourselves as the unofficial tour bus for the Roguerun, Kelly and I are working on the van in a pimp my ride stylee... watch this space...

The route is set.

Well, it was a busy bit of planning, but we have set a route. In 5 days, we are intending to cover just under 3,000 miles split between 10 Euro countries.

The country list is as follows:

England (obviously)

France (we have to hit Europe somewhere)

Monaco (has to be done)

Italy (Maranello means pretty red cars)

Slovenia (it's almost on route between Italy and never been there)

Austria (Lovely roads and Scwarzennegger museum. Also home to a really cool town name)

Germany (Hitlers retreat and some derestricted roads)

Holland (Some windmill spotting is called for)

Luxembourg (cheap beer and fags)

Brugge (Chocolate, and see the resting place of the FTO)

Then home again for a proper cup of tea and proper cuisine...

A couple of things...

Well, it appears that progress is being made. The dates are still on the to be confirmed list, but pretty sure we have them nailed down now.

The route is also still to be plotted out, but looks like:

Port grimaud, eze, Monaco, St tropez, cote d'azure area as our first proper location.

Second is the Ferrari tour.

Third is the schwarzenneger museum

Fourth is the eagles nest, hitlers retreat which the Brits captured.

Fifth is buchenwald, nazi concentration camp

Nearby is six, the national park, features a camp site which I believe Marc has hand picked as it's next to a nudist beach / park type thing.

Then quick stop off at Brugge before heading back.

If we have some spare time (we should have) then a swift stop at the Lambo and Porsche factories and maybe a sneaky coffee in Amsterdam.

So there's our plan.

I had a couple of comments from Westy and Kelly that I didn't actually know what they did for a living, so to make up for it (these are real but out of context)...

Westy describes his employment as "The whole Deliverance shebang" and Kelly spends time under her desk. I assume she spends time under other peoples desks as well and that makes me think of Police Academy.

Charlie has confirmed her love of tea and Jammie dodgers but is a little surprised I selected "that" pic from those available. Well, no-one actually got a flattering shot, indeed mine looks like a home made porn shot with my ex.

After a little discussion we decided that someone needed to be in charge to field potential problems and issues. Not that we're expecting any, but if they crop up, Duma Savage, is to take full and open responsibility.

This week, we got our certificates and thanks through from our last charity run so now seems a good time to mention we are going to try and raise a little cash for a charity that means a lot to Marc. The Jennifer Trust is a foundation that helps sufferers of Spinal Muscular Atrophy and receives very little funding.

Alongside out and out donations, we're gonna be doing the usual fund raising things, bake sale, fete's, pin the tail on the gimp, that sort of thing, but we're also looking for any companies that want to donate things so we can raffle them off as well. So far we have a couple of companies helping out with goods and services being offered, so be on the lookout for details.

I think that covers most things, but on a final note, Happy Birthday Holc, 21.

Cheers



Savage.